Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
