guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
