Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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