I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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