I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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