ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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