Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
