At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
