just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
