so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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