i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
