I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
