why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
