I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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