The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
