I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
