Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
My penis needs a shock collar
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
