Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
