i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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