She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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