Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize
