Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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