look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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