Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Randomize
