Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
this will be a night to untag.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
