To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
it was like eating out sand paper
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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