The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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