turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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