I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
