...so i touched it.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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