69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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