The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
