did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
