Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize