Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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