you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
