put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
