i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
