dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Randomize
