i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
