who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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