Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
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