Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
