and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
