Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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