You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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