So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
