Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
