ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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