It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
